A little while ago I watched a programme on television that dealt very sensitively with the delicate subject of incest.
The couple in the film were brother and sister and they had a relationship which I found fascinating to watch as there were so many parallels between them and my twin brother Michael and me.
We have recently turned 26 but the memory of how our love affair started when we were still teenagers is still as fresh as if it happened last week.
Like all twins we have always been very close and in those days we were pretty much inseparable.
This caused many social problems because his friends didn't want a girl hanging around and girls I was friendly with thought it strange that my brother was always close at hand.
If anything this tended to make us even closer and we became quite reclusive and virtually shunned other teenager's company.
Michael and I talked about sex quite a lot but at the age of 14 neither of us had had any experience.
We both read a lot and had gone through all the books in our parents' bookcases.
They also had some sex manuals hidden at the bottom of their wardrobe but we had discovered those pretty soon and knew most of the facts.
We were very open about each others bodies and did not get embarrassed if we saw each other naked.
We shared bath times even after my breasts started to develop and had watched each others puberty arrive in a very natural way.
We certainly had never done anything with each other, at least not until a holiday with our parents in Wales where we stayed in a self-catering chalet.
Mum and Dad had one bedroom and Michael and I shared the second.
The day had been fine, spent mostly at the beach, but that night there was a tremendous thunder storm which always frightened me.
As usual I crept into Michael's bed and we hugged each other for comfort until we both fell asleep.
Later that night I woke up to feel Michael lying behind me 'spoons' fashion as we often did but he wasn't lying still, he was pushing against me rhythmically.
Something hard was prodding against my bottom.
I turned round slightly to see his face - he was fast asleep.
I pulled the bedclothes aside to see what he had been pushing me with.
The storm had cleared and moonlight was streaming through the window.
I was fascinated to see a stiff rod jutting out from the gap in the front of his pyjamas.
I had often seen his penis but it had always been small and limp.
He moved forward in his sleep and the tip brushed against my thigh, below my shortie pajama bottoms.
A soft moan escaped his lips and the slow thrusting started again, nudging against me.
I didn't know what to do, should I wake him or try to get off the bed without waking him?
I became aware of the sensation against my thigh - the head of his penis was warm and firm and was leaving a damp smear against my skin as it moved.
I was getting quite excited and felt a delicious tingle between my legs accompanied by the slow seeping of wetness that I always had when I thought about sex.
My mind was in turmoil, here was my brother with his bare penis rubbing against me!
I decided I had to stop him and reached down to push him away.
My hand touched his penis but I was intrigued and couldn't bring myself to push him away completely, instead I found myself holding him in my hand, my fingers wrapped gently around his shaft.
It was wonderfully exciting and my heart beat wildly as I softly squeezed him, feeling the hot strength that flooded from his penis into my hand.
I could feel how his thrusts moved the shaft within the loose outer skin and I started to imagine his penis inside me, thrusting in my flesh.
His penis seemed to be getting even harder when suddenly he moaned and a rush of hot fluid spurted out of him, splashing across my bare legs.
I looked at his face - surely he would wake up!
Spurt after spurt jetted against me and I pushed his penis down aiming the stuff onto the bedsheets.
Gradually the emissions subsided and I felt his penis softening in my hand.
I let go of him and lay motionless for what seemed like hours until I was sure he wasn't going to wake up.
Then I slipped gently off the bed and tiptoed to my own.
I lay down and examined the fluid on the back of my legs.
It seemed to be more watery now than the thick white stuff that had initially spurted from him.
I wiped my legs dry on the bedsheet and tried to go to sleep but the image of Michael's penis spurting kept drifting back into my mind.
The next day Michael didn't show any sign of anything unusual.
I had begun to wonder if perhaps he had only been pretending to be asleep.
The day passed as normal but I was intensely aroused by the experience.
I kept finding myself looking at his crotch trying to visualise the transformation between soft little willy and that stiff pole that I had held.
I spent quite some time locking myself in the toilet as I pushed several fingers into myself as I tried to imagine what making love would be like.
We had a television in our room and that night there was a particularly scary movie on.
I hopped into Michael's bed and we snuggled together as we watched the film.
When it was over I stayed in his bed but was unable to sleep.
I kept thinking about what had happened the last time I had been in his bed.
Michael dropped off to sleep without any difficulty and about an hour later I was still wide awake, my fingers moving slowly over my clitoris and occasionally dipping into my vagina as I teased myself into a very sweaty state.
Michael lay on his side and I lay next to him, facing him. It was very warm that night and we had the bedclothes pulled down to the bottom of the bed.
I looked down at his crotch every few minutes but was disappointed that there was never a sign of his penis emerging.
I became impatient and reached down and carefully moved the slit in his pyjamas until at last the end of his soft penis fell out.
I touched it hesitantly, stroking the tip and it swelled amazingly quickly, growing bigger and bigger as it emerged from his pyjamas.
I held him in my hand as I had done before, expecting him to start to move, but he lay motionless.
I held him for several minutes and then slowly began to move my hand up and down his shaft.
It worked - almost immediately he started to thrust to and fro in my clenched fist and soon was making those little moaning sounds.
I was afraid he would wake up so I kept my eyes closed and lay very still beside him as if I was fast asleep.
Suddenly he stopped moving and I felt him lifting his head off the pillow. "Jen!" he whispered, and then was silent.
I lay still, wondering if he could hear my heart beating wildly in my chest.
I sensed that he was looking down at my hand wrapped firmly around his penis.
Would he believe that it had happened by accident in my sleep or could he tell that I was awake?
He didn't do anything for several minutes but all the while his penis stayed very hard in my hand and I could feel it throbbing with life.
He was breathing heavily and I could tell that he liked the feeling of my hand on him.
He must have thought that I really was asleep because he started to move, very gently at first but as I lay quite still, clutching him in my hand, he began to move with more confidence.
I realised that we were both committed, the previous time I had participated willingly while he was asleep and now he was getting into it when he thought I was asleep.
I don't know what made me do it but I snuggled closer to him, still holding onto his penis and opened my eyes, looking straight into his startled face.
His body jerked and he froze.
We gazed into each others eyes;
I was intensely excited but poor Michael had a look of absolute terror on his face.
He opened his mouth to say something.
"Sssh" I whispered and gave his penis a soft squeeze.
"Jen, what..? We.."
"Don't say anything, Michael" I whispered and moved closer to him.
Our heads were now only an inch apart and I kissed him softly on the lips.
I started to move my hand on him and he groaned and pulled me to him, trapping my hand between our bodies.
Our lips came together again and the kiss quickly changed from the sisterly kiss I had just given him.
Our mouths opened and we kissed passionately, our tongues darting between each others lips.
Both of us seemed to know instinctively how to kiss!
My hand had slipped to the head of his penis and Michael was groaning as he thrust rapidly into my tightly clenched fist.
My hand was soon thoroughly moistened by the juice that was seeping from him, it was deliciously slippery, and the feel of the firm knob pushing and thrusting in my hand was fantastic.
"Jen", he gasped "Oh, Aaah!"
He screwed up his face as if he was in agony and then his hips jerked convulsively as my hand suddenly filled with hot, creamy fluid.
He buried his face in the pillow as it spurted from him;
I loved the feel of it gushing into my hand and the way the thick warm liquid squirted out from between my fingers.
I held him tight, panting with my own desire until he started to soften.
After a long time he took his face out of the pillow.
"What have we just done?" he asked, a sheepish grin on his face.
"Nothing we haven't done before!" I replied.
"What do you mean?"
"Well, the other night when I slept with you you started doing it in your sleep".
"Yes you did, you were pushing against me and when I pushed you away you did it"
I held up my dripping hand. "Same as this!"
"Oh, God" he groaned and his face went back into the pillow.
"Don't worry" I said, "I didn't say I didn't like it. Anyway, I think you were probably awake all the time."
"Jen, I wasn't, I promise, I would never - honestly"
"Well you did tonight and you were awake then."
"Yes but you didn't stop, you started it!"
"Yes, I know, I wanted to"
We lay still for a while before he asked, "Is it wrong?"
"I don't think so," I said, "not if we both liked it."
"Did you like it?" he asked.
"But you only did something to me, I never.. I mean.. I didn't do anything for you."
"You kissed me which was lovely and I really liked doing it to you, it was wonderful!"
He smiled and pulled me to him and kissed me softly.
"It was wonderful for me, Jen. Do you want me to touch you?"
"I don't know, yes, but I ..."
Michael put an arm around me and with his other hand gently touched my right breast, through my pyjamas.
It was wonderful to feel him cup my breast so softly.
I reached up and unbuttoned my front and he slipped his hand in. I gasped as he stroked softly over my budding breasts and my nipples hardened instantly as his hand slid across them.
I kissed him again and our tongues met.
Slowly his hand worked down my stomach until his fingers slipped under the elastic of my pyjama bottoms.
I lifted my hips off the bed and pulled my pyjama bottoms down, slipping them off.
I felt him touch the soft hair between my legs and I sighed and let my legs slip apart.
His hand moved further down and his fingertips touched my swelling lips.
I heard myself moaning into his mouth as my body writhed on the bed.
I gasped with delight as his fingertip slipped between the lips into the hot opening.
Suddenly I had an awful thought.
"Have you ever done this before - with other girls?"
I believed him (perhaps foolishly!) and went back to enjoying the ecstasy of his finger working gently into me.
It was exquisite - I couldn't believe the fire in my loins, every nerve was tingling with the thrill.
He pushed against me and I could feel that he was very hard again, thrusting against my hip.
I reached down and held him again.
His penis now felt so natural in my hand and I moved my fist up and down on his shaft in time with the movement of his finger in me.
I could feel my pleasure rising and falling in waves and I wondered if I was going to have one of those orgasms I had read about in Mum's magazines.
I couldn't believe that the pleasure could be greater than what I was already experiencing but every second the thrill grew stronger and stronger!
Suddenly Michael's hips started to jerk.
"Jen," he gasped "I'm going to.."
The next instant a hot stream splashed across my stomach, right up to my breasts, another spurted with such force it hit the pillow by my head and I quickly pushed his penis down, trying to aim it at the sheets, but several spurts still spattered across my body.
I loved the sensation of his penis throbbing in my hand as it spurted.
I felt my own pleasure rising rapidly, but then Michael's finger stopped moving inside me and he collapsed next to me on the bed.
I now know that I had been seconds away from experiencing my first orgasm.
We were both panting loudly and I suddenly became worried that we might have been making enough noise to have been heard by mum and dad.
I kissed him softly and whispered "Ssssh, we'd better be quiet, they'll kill us if the find out!"
The room was bathed in moonlight but I wanted to see everything, I reached for the light next to the bed and switched it on.
I looked down at my stomach and breasts, there were drops of thick white liquid all over me.
A strange odour filled my nostrils - I lifted my hand from his penis and tentatively sniffed the liquid on my fingers.
"It smells very peculiar", I observed.
"Stop it, Jen, you're awful."
Michael buried his head in the pillow in embarrassment.
"I just said peculiar, I didn't say it was horrid. Anyway. I bet your fingers smell as well!"
I reached for his hand that was still between my legs and lifted it up, sniffing the finger that had given me such pleasure.
I pushed his hand under his nose, "See!" He sniffed quickly and his head went back into the pillow.
My brother was so easily embarrassed.
"Is it horrid?" I asked, suddenly concerned that he was disgusted with me.
"Now you're the one who is getting touchy!" he said and laughed.
"The boys at school say its supposed to smell fishy but I don't think it does."
I was reassured.
We cleaned each other with tissues and fastened our pyjamas up so that we were decent once more.
Then we lay back on the held and kissed and held each other for hours as we talked.
I knew I had always loved my brother but now my love for him was very, very different!
Would anyone like to read Part Two?
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